Have you ever known someone who ends up dating the same person in a different body even though they know better?
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result.
Why is this so common and so predictable?
I mean, we may know we are headed down a path that won’t end well. But, we do it anyway.
So, How do we recognize it’s time to make a change? How do we stop dysfunctional behavior before we make a drastic mistake?
If you’re anything like me I always have felt more comfortable working. Work was something I could control and, for the most part I’ve been my own boss. That comes with the territory when you’re a writer. What I struggled with for years was how to function effectively when I was outside my comfort zone.
After many misfires and failed relationships (professional and personal) I was faced with a choice: keep making the same mistakes and be stuck in my life. Or do whatever it took to improve my situation. So, I approached sorting out my life differently. I applied the critical thinking and creative problem solving skills I used every day as a writer.
It was a bold move but I had reached a crossroads. My choice was to be miserable or find a way forward. I needed to pivot. I needed to look at myself through a different lens and see where I was failing and then commit to a strategy and tactics that would get me to where I wanted to go.
The big revelation was that this wasn’t all that different from the creative work I had been doing composing skills and writing arrangements. My challenge was to recognize what in my self-created identity wasn’t working and what was.
It wasn’t easy and there were missteps along the way. But, because i stuck with it I was able to achieve many of my dreams. Now, when I want to strike out and do something different I am confident because I’ve done it many times before. Successfully navigating your way through life isn’t magic. It’s a skill. And, if you work at it, if you practice, you’ll get better.
If you are a musician and composer you have the ability to survive in challenging times because you have the:
The key is to recognize that (in many cases) what is holding you back from achieving your goals is the identity you have created. Not the reality of who you are.
Look at yourself objectively. Accept the bad and celebrate the good. And, if it doesn’t work out then you can pivot and try something else. There is no failure. Only opportunities to learn.
Easier said than done. But, eminently doable.
Remember: you are sitting on a gold mine of skills and abilities that can be applied in other circumstances if you are willing to look in the mirror and see the real you.
Try it some time. You might be surprised at what you find.
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